Why do children run when their fathers come back to the house?

It's my brother's birthday today and I'm thinking of 3 ways to make him feel loved without telling him. Without even hinting him that I do. Our relationship hasn't been strained but we've never succeeded to build a strong bond. I'm just scared that as the years pass, we might end up having that kind of father-son relationship in which talking is not done, but a lot of agreeing is.

And it's rather fortunate for me that I grew up with a father who didn't scare us. We didn't need to run to our rooms on hearing his footsteps or his motorcycle engine. It's also unfortunate that we didn't, at least most of us, didn't build a solid relationship with him. Because one's relationship with a father(especially for the male child) is priceless.

Some weeks ago I had the opportunity to visit an uncle I hadn't seen for a long time and whilst staying with him and his family, I couldn't but notice that his children would run into the bedroom whenever he came back. Which gets me pondering: Why do children go to their rooms when their parents(mostly the fathers) return from work?

This article is not factual, but based on personal observation. In trying to solve this enigma, I figured some of the reasons that push children away from their fathers...

1. Children flow with the energy you introduce them to. If you want them to love you, they will. If you want them to fear you, they will. If you want them to hate you, they will.

2. Some fathers are not only authoritative, but authoritarian. Some parents want to have total control of their children's lives and when they're not around, their children enjoy liberty. This is funny because parents are supposed to be this safe refuge you run to. But it's not been the case for a long time. Children prefer to die with their problems than tell their parents.

2. The modern day father is still trying to live like the ancient fathers. He inspires fear and he loves it that way. He doesn't feel he needs to talk emotional issues with his children because "it is the place of the mother to do that..." So he is nothing but a figure of authority and sometimes, oppression.

4. The father to a greater extent doesn't believe in the legitimacy of children's feelings. He doesn't even know that a child feels these little energies we always carry around.

5. A father doesn't believe a child can relax. While mommy let's her kids watch a but of Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon, daddy would put only News Channels. Little children don't relate that much with news. This could always be balanced.

There might be more legitimate reasons or more factual reasons but these are those I drew from my observation. No matter how lively a house is, the mood changes to sombre immediately the father walks in. Is it because we are in an African setting? Is it because fathers have huge loads on their heads? Or is it because as a man, you need to show a certain level of composure? I don't know why but I think as fathers, brothers or future fathers, we can do better. We should!